In a Toronto Star article today called “Mind the ‘Orgasm Gap'”, a reporter called Francine Koupon (a business writer) wrote about the findings of a “large sex survey”. Like everything else in life, “large” is a matter of personal judgment, depth perception and visual acuity. Having said that, there were some interesting tidbits.

Speaking of tidbits, did you know that, according to Mark Morton in a booked called,  Cupboard Love: A Dictionary of Culinary Curiosities: “It remains the usual spelling and pronunciation in North America but in England titbit is more common, the change in form occurring as people confused the word tid with the word tit; the tit in question, however, is not the vulgar one that means breast but rather the tit that means small, of Scandinavian origin. This tit occurs in compounds such as titmouse, the name of a creature that, despite its name, is not a small mouse but a variety of small bird. The titmouse has, of course, been a source of titillation for generations of British schoolboys…”

“Vulgar… breasts”. “British schoolboys”. Well, those are topics for another day. Mark is a Canadian and author of another intriguingly titled book – The Lover’s Tongue: A Merry Romp Through the Language of Love and Sex. Food porn! I can’t wait to read them both.

Back to the survey…

  • About 85 per cent of the men in the survey of 5,865 people between the ages of 14 and 94 said their partner had an orgasm during their most recent sexual encounter. Only 64 per cent of women reported reaching orgasm.

“It’s unclear what that orgasm gap is, whether that many women are faking — are pretending to have an orgasm — or not,” says Debby Herbenick, associate director of the Center for Sexual Health Promotion at Indiana University, and one of the authors of the report. “I think both sexes really need to better communicate about sex.”

  • The study also found that fewer teenagers are having sex than one might think, and that people in their 80s are engaging in a variety of sexual activities, including masturbation.
  • Among the 50 women over 80 in the study, 100 per cent reported having masturbated with a partner within the past year, according to Herbenick. Some of the women were married, some were widowed, some had romantic partners or “friends with benefits.”

“It showed that for some people sexual activity can occur throughout life, and there’s not a pure stopping point, just like there’s not a pure starting point,” said Herbenick.

She pointed out that it’s important to be careful about data with the small numbers of people over 80 in the statistical survey.

“It’s like seeing on TV an 80-year-old who finishing their first marathon. That’s great for that 80-year-old, but does that mean that every 80-year-old should take up running? I think the same is true for sex. For so many people, stopping or slowing down sexually is actually a nice part of aging for them,” said Herbenick.

So listen, Francine honey. Take up running? Why not, if you have your orthotics in and wear proper footwear? Nice? Nice is for the Easter Bunny not the Tooth Fairy (not the Dwayne ‘The Rock’ Johnson version, although…never mind). Who wants to be ‘nice’ when you’ve lived for four decades and can still get it on or can still remember what getting it on is and how to get it on? Go Seniors, go Seniors! Makes me glad to be a Boomer – there’s a lot more of the good stuff to look forward to!

And the news that only 27% of 17-year old males reported intercourse in the last 90 days? Well, duh! They should be studying or playing organized sports, reading books, helping around the house and working part time jobs. Plenty of time to get their carrots buffed when they’re old enough to vote and start conmtributing to the CPP, I say.

Among the study’s other findings:

  • Women over 50 were more likely to reach orgasm when having sex with a new acquaintance. (No surprise here, is there? It’s the passion of newness, the thrill of mutual exploration and discovery, paying close attention to one another, comfort with oneself, cumulative horniness)
  • Although uncommon among 14- to 15-year-olds, in the past year 18.3 per cent of 16- to 17-year-old males and 22.4 per cent of 16- to 17-year-old females performed oral sex with an other-sex partner. (Inequality, girls and boys – gotta even up those percentages)

Folks over 50 rule; they also rock (and roll a little bit when the beat is right-on). Now, how many times have you been asked questions by a surveyor wanting to know something other than what type of laundry soap you use or what political party you support? It’s usually Patsy from the carpet/duct/gutter-cleaning company that’ll be in your neighbourhood tomorrow. Who gets those interesting calls that make you want to let your dinner cool as you respond to inquiries about the fun stuff? Do you know anyone?

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