Whether you are pushing 40, 50, 60, 70 (or maybe even just pushing your luck), you’ll probably be able to relate.

Mid-life is when the growth of hair on our legs slows down. This gives us plenty of time to care for our newly acquired mustache.

In mid-life women no longer have upper arms, we have wing spans. We are no longer women in sleeveless shirts, we are flying squirrels in drag.

Mid-life is when you can stand naked in front of a mirror and you can see your rear without turning around.

Mid-life is when you go for a mammogram and you realize that this is the only time someone will ask you to appear topless.

Mid-life is when you want to grab every firm young lovely in a skimpy, elastic band of a dress and scream, ‘Listen, honey, even the Roman empire fell and those will too..’

Mid-life brings wisdom to know that life throws us curves and we’re sitting on our biggest ones.


In mid-life your memory starts to go. You run up the stairs and jolt to a stop thinking, What did I come up here for? But you can remember in vivid detail that drive-in movie you were watching when your first boyfriend with his dad’s borrowed car slipped his trembling fingers under your sweater. In fact the only thing we can retain easily is water.

Mid-life means that you become more reflective. You start pondering the ‘big’ questions. What is life? Why am I here? How much low-fat ice cream can I eat with a sugar-free brownie before it’s no longer a healthy choice?

But mid-life also brings with it an appreciation for what is important. We realize that breasts sag, hips expand, and chins double, but our loved ones make the journey worthwhile.

Would any of you trade the knowledge that you have now, for the body you had way back when?

Maybe our bodies simply have to expand to hold all the wisdom and love we’ve acquired. That’s my philosophy and I’m sticking to it!

(Thanks for the chuckles, Myrna)