Here’s my newest acquisition – a handy gizmo called Mr. Heater. Who thinks up these names? I want that job. Now, the erotic writer in me would love to use that product name as a story-starter.
Something about a young man who hitch-hikes (time for stories, mishaps and ‘exploration’) from up north south into the Big Smoke looking for adventure and a decent-paying job. He’s got a degree and a journeyman’s ticket in high-pressure welding (double-entendre territory), but the opportunities weren’t that great in the small town he grew up in (left his high school sweetie and the family farm behind). He tried working a 9 to 5 gig as a trainee banker but didn’t like the constraints of having to wear a suit every day and sit behind a cheap desk in a windowless office trying to sell financial products. What will I call him? Rhett (been done). Chet? Duke? No, not Duke – that’s the neighbour’s dog’s name. Chet likes to wear cowboy clothes. Dark, smoldering eyes, unruly dark hair, a scar under his jaw where he got kicked by a calf. Being a farm boy, he knows what’s what in the barnyard, if you get my drift. He winds up….Not now…. I have too much editing to do.
Anyhow, see how easily I get distracted? After I went to Home Depot (the guy in the apron got all excited when I said ‘weed torch’ but you had to order their version online), Canadian Tire was as helpful as ever (nope, we don’t carry that), Home Hardware was prepared to order one in (but I wanted it now). Thank goodness for Princess Auto, the home of ‘tool and gadget porn’.
I waltzed in, undecided whether or not I should take a quick pit stop or rush home for lunch. A helpful young man’s face lit up when I asked and he led me to the back of the store where shop equipment and tires are stored and handed me a long thin box containing a length of rubber hose, a flame thrower type nozzle attached to a brass rod and a sparker-lighter thingy. $69. Cheaper than Lee Valley or Home Depot.It attaches to the BBQ tank, which means I won’t run out of propane before I singe all the weedy buggers lurking on the front steps and in the lawn. He did suggest that I have a supply of water close by in case I get too enthusiastic and set something on fire that I shouldn’t.Yeah, I guess no singeing the weeds that are rooted in pine bark mulch.
I was in and out of the store in less than 10 minutes. Had a nice lunch with Hub on the deck. As soon as I’ve rested up and done some deck-time reading, I’ll don my protective gear and head out to char those vigorous green pests to the roots. Another great day in the country!
Thank you very much!