Happy New Year! I’m hungry. Stomach rumbling, head aching hungry. Why is it that every year, I start off with good intentions.Try to eat less and drink lots more fluid. End up running to the bathroom every half an hour until I’m tired of unzipping and zipping up again. Thinking of going out for a walk, but it takes so long to get on my snow pants and my ski jacket and hats, mitts and scarf. It snowed last night so I might need my snowshoes. I get tired tromping along the sidewalk in  my snowshoes. And it’s windy and minus 114 and what if I have to make a pit stop before I get home? Everything is closed today. Nah, I’ll stay inside. Maybe do some knitting. Or ironing.

Of course, last night I filled my face with an excellent 2005 Cabernet sauvignon from Marynissen Winery in Niagara on the Lake. Garlicky rare strip loin roast. Hasselback potatoes roasted with rosemary and butter. Arugula salad. Just writing that down makes my eyes sore. There are a couple of bags of caramel popcorn I made before Christmas. Salty-sweet crunchy goodness. Then there’s the rest of the mini- fruitcakes. I have half a liter of whipping cream I should do something with. Waste not want not.

Except that’s been my philosophy for more years than I care to remember. And now it’s all on my waist, dammit. Every year, I saw to myself – you can do this. And I’ve done it. Fifteen pounds one year. Twenty-two pounds another year. Then I hit my target and figure that I can cheat just a little bit. That little bit turns into a lot and I’m back where I started. Or farther behind, in fact. I used to be an athlete, for heaven’s sake. But now, when I stand naked and stare at my thickening body in the mirror, I can’t see much of the athlete anymore. That has bothered me for a long time.

Today, I’m doing something different. I signed up with a website called Burn the Fat.  I’ve read some of the material before, but never felt motivated. This time, I filled out the application online . Clicked on PayPal. Joined the Inner Circle. For a $120 investment (what I spend on gas for my car for 3 weeks) I’m committing myself to get healthier. Leaner. Rebuild my muscles from flab to fab.

I understand that I have to set realistic goals. You see, I’m a Type A++ personality. A pursuer of perfection in many things.But it’s oh so easy to fall from grace and stumble back down the road to over-indulging. Setting up this blog is one way of making myself publicly accountable. It matters not to me whether anyone else reads it. I’m putting myself ‘out there’, just a smidgeon at a time. For my self. To be a better self.  I’m going to (try to) post every day. At the end of the year, I’ll measure what I’ve accomplished.